Tag Archives: politics

Thai Math

Common sense has returned to Thailand, when the present government admitted before the Year of the Dragon ushered in that the recreational use of cannabis or marijuana is wrong, which was decriminalized in the kingdom in 2022.

Mr. Chonlanan Srikaew, Thai health minister, said that the government will soon be moving a new bill that will allow the drug to be used only for health and medicinal purposes.

Indeed, a big blow to hundreds of marijuana dispensary owners, and to millions of tourists who’re planning to visit the “Land of a Thousand Smiles” to get a kick out of marijuana.

And to a small extent, the ban will also affect recreational math educators who’ve started working on new and fertile questions that incorporate the legalized use of marijuana recreationally.

Should “Thailand math” questions be allowed in recreational math classrooms?

Marijuana Math

In an earlier post on “Marijuana Math” under “Math Word of the Day,” on LinkedIn, I poked fun that in tourism the “fine” city of Singapore would likely be losing out against Thailand. I mentioned tongue-in-cheek a few positives of Thailand being a “marijuana mecca” for adventurous or uninhibited tourists, especially those who come from conservative countries that criminalize the use of the drug recreationally.

With the new cannabis law in the pipeline, the number of tourists bypassing budget-unfriendly, family-friendly Singapore for wallet-friendly, pro-same-sex unions Thailand should be expected to be far lower than initially feared.

Math on a High

Let’s indulge in some recreational Thai Math questions, while there is some time to be on a high. The window of opportunity to enjoy these soon-to-be-banned word problems is closing in fast, unless the power-hungry military stages another coup to put in place a new pro-cannabis government.

1. A MAGA patriot, who recently visited Thailand, was caught with 24 cannabis candies and chewing gums in his locker at Mar-a-Lago. The fine is $80 for each candy, and $90 for each chewing gum. If the judge sentenced the culprit for a total of $2,010, how many candles and how many chewing gums were seized?

2. Which has the higher chance of occurring in the next quarter century: Singapore qualifying for the World Cup, or Singapore allowing tourists (but not locals and permanent residents) to use marijuana recreationally?

3. If the medicinal use of marijuana debatably proved to be a quasi-effective cure in treating math anxiety, mathophobia, or other mathematical disorders in a-not-too-distant future, would the “fine” city condone its use among its oft-self-professed semi-innumerate citizens?

Like the days of the legalization of recreational cannabis in Thailand, the days of the recreational use of Thai Math questions, too, look numbered.

Recreationally or restrictively yours

References

Thai government plans to ban recreational cannabis use http://tinyurl.com/mt6fhs2m

Number of young children who accidentally ate cannabis edibles jumped 1,375% in five years, study finds http://tinyurl.com/2mwb55d9

© Yan Kow Cheong, February 11, 2024.

What’s Your Life PhD?

For the majority of people around the world without a PhD, the academic title is often creatively or cynically assigned a different meaning. Talking of poking fun at those who make a living in an ivory tower—the image of an “ivory tower” is used in the Bible in the Song of Songs (7:4) to describe a woman’s purity—the lay public’s general impression or perception of most PhDs is often anything but positive. Could this be due to some subconscious “intellectual envy”?

Maybe because when they think of academics becoming politicians or of them serving as consultants or advisors for an oft-inept or corrupt government (or of an educational consultant for a publishing house hoping to boost their school adoption rate), many have mixed feelings about these exam-smart folks, who are mostly “un-street-smart,” when it comes to solving everyday life or real-world problems for their fellow citizens—their oft-halfwitted decisions often serve as a living proof of their (practical) unintelligence rather than their intelligence.

PhDs to Save the Planet from Covid-19

Below are three entries I submitted during the lockdown two-odd years ago.

Trump’s Covid-19 Con-sultant
Was Cummings, ex-PM Johnson’s “corona jerk”?
One rule for the Cummings and
one for the common people.

Be it the canned “Permanent Head Damage” or “Post Holiday Depression,” new meanings associated with the acronym are only limited by our imagination.

Boosted Jabs at PhDs

A few years ago, I started relooking at new meanings of a PhD. Two such revised definitions were:

Cheat PhD on the Cheap
God’s Doctorate Disciples

What’s your life’s PhD, especially when you respectfully compare yourself with those with big titles, most of whom often have infinitesimally positive or quasi-zero impact on those around them?

Meanwhile, why not pray, help, and do rather than just preach, hope, and delay?

© Yan Kow Cheong, March 25, 2023.

A North Korea without the Kims

North Korea and the Kim Dynasty

Way back in 2017, when ISIS or radical Islamist ideologies were making inroads in a number of developing or war-torn countries, and North Korea then looked like the safest place on the planet from green terrorism, I coined North Korea as follows:

North Korea: Where jihadists daren’t go in trying to Islamize infidels unless they don’t mind going to hell sooner than later to meet up with ex-dictators Kim Jong Il and Kim Il Sung.

ISIS or the Taliban is no match for Dictator Kim Jong Un’s trained killers, if these Mohammedan jihadists dream of going to North Korea to set up their Caliphate.

by MathPlus May 31, 2017

The Kim Dynasty

The Kim dynasty is “like grandfather, like father, like son.” Would the world witness a gender change at the top, if a sister (and subsequently a daughter, legitimate or not) were to be reluctantly appointed, thus breaking the decades-long patriarchal political order? A modern-day Jezebel in waiting!

North Korea & Math Education

Imagine if North Korean students were to take part in TIMSS and PISA, what are the chances that they would outrank or outwit their Singaporean or mainland Chinese counterparts in both math and science?

Or, if you needed a part-time or freelance value-for-money coder (or licenced hacker), would you choose one from Singapore, India, or North Korea? The choice is pretty clear, isn’t it?

Dark Political Math

From Reel Trump to Real Kim

After Comrade Kim’s last heartbeat, what are the odds that the two Koreas might be reunited as one? Or would this reunification happen earlier, say, if the hermit nation was forced to surrender following a series of bombings on Pyongyang or on its nuclear sites by the Allies?

Broken Bromance Blossomed

Imagine that Donald J. Trump is miraculously re-elected in 2024, and the Trump-Kim lukewarm bromance is rekindled with a flurry of more “love letters.”

Reel Leaders Nominated for Nobel Peace Prize

What are the odds that they’d eventually have a tête-à-tête at the White House? A post-pandemic reunion between two vainglorious rogues that could help raise their chances of being nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for the nth time, as their actions (or inactions) arguably prevented a WW3!

The Peacefakers Sans Clothes

What if fearing that he’d end up on the wrong side of eternity, and also be remembered as a modern-day Hitler or Stalin, comrade Putin decided to return the annexed lands, including Crimea, to Ukraine? Would the world witness a peace prize being shared by the unholy Kim-Putin-Trump trio? Or would all three be re-nominated for the Ignoble Peace Prize instead?

The Leadershit Series for Rogue Leaders

Fake Missile for Anti-NATO*

Would the US and allies (yes-nations) only stop playing the more-sanctions game when Kim Jong-un’s patience ran out—when he decided to launch a “fake” missile targeting one of its neighbours, which would force them to take the rogue nation seriously or to treat the Kim dynasty with respect or reverence?

Peacefully & prayerfully yours

* NATO = No Action, Talk Only

© Yan Kow Cheong, March 3, 2023.

Is a Kim Jong-un one too many?

Based on newspaper headlines over the years, how would you characterize or describe North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un? Or how would you compare him vis-à-vis other rogue heads of state in terms of IQ and EQ?

With recent or renewed interest into the warped mind of the North Korean dictator, especially with pictures of him and his (“overfed” or “overweight”) daughter, I wanted to use Kim Jong-un as “Word of the Day.”

My recent irreverent description of the über-fat soul in a land of millions of undernourished fellow citizens is the following:

A potential Nobel Prize winner

The Unholy Trinity

A less-than soothing decision: Is North Korea’s leader Kim Jong Un, a wolf in sheep’s clothing or a wolf in wolf’s clothing?

Erdogan or Modi or Xi: “a wolf in sheep’s clothing” Putin: “a wolf in wolf’s clothing”
Kim: “a wolf in sheep’s/wolf’s clothing”?

A blasphemous political question to ask is: “What are the odds that Kim Jong-un might be “a sheep in wolf’s clothing”?

Kim & Twitter

Does the “Supreme Leader” Kim Jong Un have a Twitter account? The Pope and the Dalai Lama have one. Shouldn’t the dictator-murderer have one, too?

Kim’s fake Twitter account

Of course, there are fake Twitter accounts of Kim, mostly demonizing rather than deifying him, but it’d be interesting that he makes a digital presence on Elon Musk’s platform to spice up the Twittersphere, while ex-comrade Trump is itching to tweet again, if not because of the financial penalty he’d face if he deserted Truth Social.

The Anointed One

If ex-president Trump was the “Chosen One,” aren’t rogue leaders like Kim Jong Un, Vladimir Putin, Recep Tayyip Erdogan, and Xi Jinping also God’s “political appointees” to rule or misrule their nations? Are they the modern-day Babylonians or forerunners of the Beast?

A Health Hub for Dictators

[Fake] Math News: Singapore took in rogue leaders like Thein Sein, Robert Mugabe, Hun Sen, Kim Jong-un, and Rajapaksa despite their manifold crimes. What are the odds that Donald J. Trump would likely add the “fine” city as his sanctuary of choice should he be imprisoned and become a fugitive for his Jan. 6 coup?

To Bomb or Not to Bomb

Political Calculus: How long would the US & allies ignore Dictator-Murderer Kim Jong-un & gang? Would they be forced to bomb Pyongyang to prevent the “little rocket man” from accidentally hitting his neighbors?

Kim & Trump as Putin’s Special Guests

What are the odds that Donald J. Trump could be the only ex-President from the U.S. (or the West) who is still welcome in Moscow besides pro-Putin dictators Alexander Lukashenko & Kim Jong Un—and Xi Jinping if he’d compromise to supply weapons to Russia?

Who’s the Baddest of All?

Faux Leadership: Does comparing Abraham Lincoln’s leadership with Donald Trump’s leadershit sound like contrasting Lee Kuan Yew’s wisdom with Kim Jong Un’s wisdoom?

Kim’s Covert Salespeople

An “unlucky” North Korean caught for shipping luxury goods to his comrades at home was given a symbolic one-month jail sentence in the “fine” city. Estimate how many dozens of Kim Jong Un’s salesmen and saleswomen are currently in Singapore, and thousands of them in the region.

© Yan Kow Cheong, February 25, 2023.

Pi versus WHO

Pi recently took a page from Singapore’s only ruling party’s decades-long successful template how to stay in power perpetually, with quasi-zero public protests, strikes, and riots.

Will Pi win her viral legal case against the World Health Organization (WHO)? Millions of math teachers worldwide are unspokenly hoping that the WHO won’t alienate or betray Pi, just as it did for the marginalized and unrecognized variant Xi.

Would Pi be vindicated for unfairly being discriminated by those who’re playing politics to prevent her from being admitted as a bona-fide corona variant worthy of WHO’s recognition?

Imagine how excited math educators globally would be if Pi won her legal case against the WHO.

Come Pi Day or Pi Approximation Day, if the 16th letter of the Greek alphabet were officially declared a WHO-approved variant by then, schools and universities would be electrified in conducting an eclectic mix of pi talks and lectures to promote Pi’s ambivalent “murderous” new status.

I, for one, have started to work on Murderous Pi—the title of a math e-book to celebrate Pi’s evolution from a humble mathematical constant to a proud corona variant, which would be plagued with devilish or wicked problems on mathematics’s most beloved irrational number.

Are you looking forward for Pi’s long-overdue recognition by WHO’s health professionals in the Lunar New Year of the Rabbit?

Until she’s virally credited for her fatally mixed impact on earthlings before she’d rest in peace to make way for Rho and Sigma, who’re lining up to be WHO-recognized, Pi’s rejection would be perceived as an irrational [mathematical & viral] injustice or betrayal, whose aftermath paranoiac behaviors among math educators and virologists worldwide could potentially be unpeaceful, to say the least.

Like the “infidel” Zero, who’s ostracized by the Church Fathers of yesteryear, may the “agnostic” or “devilish” Pi be vindicated as she longs to gain formal approval to be in the company of fellow corona variants.

© Yan Kow Cheong, January 17, 2023

Will Pi Be WHO-Recognized?

Political Math in Singapore

Moons ago, long before Trump’s MAGA slogan resonated among blue-collar workers and white evangelicals, I was surprised to read a parent’s guide mentioning that some American homeschoolers had mixed feelings about using foreign editions of Singapore math textbooks because of the lack of political freedom in the island-state.

No matter how value-for-money Singapore math titles are, or how impressive the “fine” city’s top ranking in both PISA and TIMSS is, some American parents and teachers would have nothing to do with a country that stifles freedom of speech, restricts political freedom, or cracks down on alternative views that often portray the government in a negative light.

Singapore is a partly free country.

This week, we read that in the new normal Singapore has fared worse than the previous year as far as political rights and civil liberties are concerned. If 50 were the passing mark, then the island-state fell short, by scoring a disappointing 48 out of 100 on political freedom.

Singapore’s Freedom in the World
https://freedomhouse.org/country/singapore

Selective Internet Accessibility

Less well-known is Singapore’s average performance or ranking in terms of the public’s internet access, especially when both locals and aliens thought they could easily access the internet (except for some banned websites on politics, religion, and sex, or most political blogs that don’t depict the country’s political leaders positively), compared to their counterparts in China, where Google, Facebook, and Twitter are banned.

Singapore’s Freedom on the Net
https://freedomhouse.org/country/singapore/freedom-net/2020

Political Freedom: Singapore vs. Others

Although we may not agree on the methodology used to compute the scores, which are calculated on a weighted scale, however, the global freedom ranking of most countries appears pretty accurate.

Let’s look at some freedom scores, by comparing how Singapore fares vis-à-vis some rich or rogue countries.

North Korea: 3 (not free)
China: 9 (not free)
Burma: 28 (not free)
Singapore: 48 (partly free)
Malaysia: 51 (partly free)
Hong Kong: 52 (partly free)
Philippines: 56 (partly free)
Indonesia: 59 (partly free)
India: 67 (partly free)
South Africa: 79 (free)
US: 83 (free)
UK: 93 (free)
Taiwan: 94 (free)
Japan : 96 (free)
Norway: 100 (free)

Source: https://freedomhouse.org/countries/freedom-world/scores

Make Singapore Free (and Great) Again!

Since the start of the coronavirus pandemic, in the aftermath of more pseudo-free nations going rogue, or more institutions paying lip service to democratic processes, I remember less than three years ago coining tongue-in-cheek “Make Singapore Free Again.”

The Fear Factor in Singapore

The Fear Factor as a Common Denominator

What are some long-term consequences for math educators living in a politically semi-free milieu? Teachers who need to seek permission from their HODs or principals to start a blog or a Facebook page; or writers who need to consult editors or publishers before they start working on a politically incorrect or irreverent math title.

When I started blogging, I still recall that those who had a say in my pay wanted me to choose a different name that doesn’t include “Singapore Math” as part of the blog’s identity. Apparently, every time they Googled “Singapore math,” they landed on my site, and they’re uncomfortable with that. I refused to compromise because I thought then (and now) that the idea of censoring or threatening me for raising some unethical practices in educational publishing is laughably ridiculous, not to say, mathematically or educationally anti-democratic.

It’s not an accident or coincidence that high-GDP Singapore has probably the lowest number of math bloggers, or the least number of math teachers on Twitter, in the developed world.

For some of us, who look like an odd in a sea of evens, the “fear factor” of speaking up and speaking out is real, even if our audience is outside Singapore. As long as we are a “mathematical or political nobody,” it’s probably safe to say that we’re at quasi-zero risk of being banned or censored, while being aware that a small army of vigilantes are watching us 24/7/365 just in case we go “politically astray.”

POFMA Math

During the lockdown, when a few Opposition candidates appeared to be unfairly targeted for their “fake” comments, I entertained the possibility that soon the authorities would be targeting math bloggers or textbook authors, who poked fun at some MOE directives or policies, by irreverently christening POFMA Math.

What are the odds that Singapore math authors would be the next to be POFMA-ed?

Poverty or Democracy

For decades, the unspoken or unchallenged political message in Singapore for Singaporeans and foreigners is: High GDP or Low Political Liberty. You can’t have both!

Why can’t your say and your pay go hand in hand? The lie that a country’s economic prosperity and political freedom are inversely proportional needs to be debunked at all costs, because failure to do so would only perpetuate mediocrity, economic stagnancy, political apathy, and uncreativity among the citizenry.

Democratically and richly yours

© Yan Kow Cheong, March 6, 2021.

Covid-19, Halloween, and Hell

Halloween in Singapore: To Spook or Not to Spook

 

For math-anxious or mathophobic folks, mathematics is more terrifying than being attacked by an army of vampires, werewolves, and zombies. For the health-conscious, Covid-19 is a thousand times deadlier than Halloween and Donald J. Trump combined. And for those on the far-left of the political spectrum, Trumpvirus is a googol times more lethal than the product of the coronavirus and Halloween. So, it looks like it depends what really matters to you to rationalize which is more frightening: Halloween, Covid-19, or Trump-45.

For conservatives or evangelicals, who recognize the dangers posed by the dark spiritual forces, Halloween is a festival of the devil, because ghosts or evil spirits are real and dangerous. How do math educators navigate through the occultic maze to leverage on a spookacular festival to promote numeracy and creative problem solving?

When Halloween is a multi-million-dollar fear-and-fun business in secular societies like China, Japan, and Singapore, math educators regardless of their religious affiliations have to recognize that Halloween is here to stay. 

Yellow Halloween

When Asians too feel like celebrating a Western fright-wear festival like Halloween—the spooky business worth millions of dollars is too good to give it a miss.

The yellow Halloween provides an opportunity for rich Chinese and Japanese participants to show off their creative elaborate costumes, bringing much joy to organizers and dozens of tailors cashing in on the event.

by MathPlus November 03, 2016

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Yellow+Halloween

Let's look at a sample of Halloween math questions.

1. A Horror Movie

Thou shalt not dabble in numerology!

The screening of Covid-19 v. Trump-45 ended at 1:19 AM. If the horror movie lasted for 1 hour 31 minutes, what time did it start?

 

 

 

A poster outside a Singapore bookstore

2. The Ghostly Time

What is the acute angle measure between the hands of a clock at 10:31 p.m. on Halloween?

 

 

 

 

 

3. Horror-scope & Bat-man

#PumpkinSpice from Edel Rodriguez (@edelstudio on 19/10/17)

Today is Friday, and Trump’s numerologist tells him that he will have to drink the blood of a bat 666 days from today to continue to lead a “normal life” after he leaves the White House. What day of the week is Donald expected to do that task?

 

 

4. TrumpMath, Anyone?

 

5. A Grave Calculation

Not all sins or bad habits are treated equal!

Assuming that most people would live up to three scores and ten years, how long will it take before the whole world is covered in gravestones?

 

 

 

 

 

6. Operation Vampire

The Power of the Cross

If a vampire were to feed once a day and turn each of his victims into a vampire, show that the entire human population of the planet would become vampires in just over a month.

The Ghost Month and Halloween

Long before the East imported Halloween from the West, superstitious Asians have been celebrating their one-month-long version of Halloween, known as the “Ghost (or Seventh) Month”—a far more scarier festival than a mere evening of horror fun.

My hypothesis is: Halloween is no more than one-seventh as frightening as the Ghost Month, a festival celebrated in many parts of Asia every August or September, depending when those spiritual vagabonds from hell decided to descend on earth.

The coronavirus pandemic and the Seventh Month provide math teachers with new math terms to coin, and allow them to pose a number of deadly guesstimation problems. Below are a few of these Covid-math terms.  


On August 8, 2020, @SingaporeLite tweeted the following:

Covid-👿

Corona Math: What are the odds that hungry ghosts from Hell who’d roam Earth during the Ghost or Seventh Month—Aug 19–Sep 16—are corona-proof? Besides instilling fear on superstitious folks, aren’t they also a source of infection? todayonline.com/node/8269421 #Singapore #Covid-19 👿🦠

The Deities & the Deceased  The Math of Hell: A politically correct explanation of the burning of hell money: Why the deities like odd numbers, and the deceased like even numbers. https://www.facebook.com/MothershipSG/videos/experts-explain-burning-offerings-in-singapore/336558850793421/ #Singapore #Taoism #hell #Buddhism #ghost #evil #spirit #Chinese #culture #tradition #fear #math #number (@SingaporeLite on 20/9/20)

On July 1, 2020, @SakamotoMath tweeted the following picture and text.

Happy Math-O-Ween! from @MrHonner

 

Corona Math: Given that the coronavirus is empowered to infect both earthlings and celestial beings, guesstimate the no. of infections among the fallen angels that colluded with Lucifer to challenge the Throne of God in the heavenlies. #Covid-19 #heaven #hell #angel #math #humor

Halloween vs. Coronavirus

Which is scarier to you: Halloween or Covid-19? How are you remembering those who would still be around if not because of the coronavirus? Is fake political leadership responsible for their premature departure to the other side of eternity? #Halloween #Covid-19 #death #leadership (@SakamotoMath on 30/10/20)

Covid-19 Goes Green

The coronavirus doesn’t discriminate against believers, nonbelievers, or agnostics—it infects or kills people of all religions or philosophies with the same intensity.

From Paranormal to Trumpnormal Distribution
Q: What do you get when you cross Covid-19 and Statistics? 

A: The Trumpnormal distribution.

 

A “ghost distribution” from @wilderlab

Political Engineering: Stop flattening and start trumpifying the curve to open up more businesses across the US—more testings and tracings don’t win an election! #statistics #coronavirus #Covid-19 #business #lockdown #distribution #Singapore #math #infection #death #curve #humor

Coronavirus’s Nineteen Names

Just as President Trump has been conferred so many notorious titles, the coronavirus has been given all kinds of racist labels.   

7. Not All Corona Prayers Are the Same!

A Shaolin Buddhist abbot can pray for a Covid-19 patient to be healed in 8 days and a Baptist bishop in 2 days. How long would it take them to get a patient who is twice as sick to fully recover, if both leaders prayed together?

 

Selected Answers: 1. 11:48 PM     2. 129.5°     3. Saturday     5. Over a million years     7. 3.2 days

References

Correl, G. (2015). The worrier’s guide to life. Missouri: Andrews McMeel Publishing.

Lloyd, J., Mitchinson, J. & Harkin, J. (2012). 1,227 QI facts to blow your socks off. London: Faber and Faber.

Santos, A. (2009). How many licks? Philadelphia: Running Press.

Singh, S. (2013). Homer Simpson’s scary maths problemshttps://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-24724635

Yan, K.C. (2012). Halloween Mathhttps://www.singaporemathplus.com/2012/10/halloween-math.html

© Yan Kow Cheong, October 31, 2020.

© Photo by Gemma Correl

Poop Calculus

A National University of Singapore’s brochure cover promoting math and art.

A fortnight ago, Center of Math (@centerofmath) tweeted the following picture:

Imagine if Donald Trump were your high school math teacher. How would he disruptively or irreverently use the above illustration to teach some “pop (or poop) calculus” to his math-anxious Liberal Arts students?

From Epstein to Trump

President Trump’s “fun buddy” of yesteryear, Jeffrey Epstein, was unverifiably a pretty good math teacher before he became a successful financier, whose sinful soul had since journeyed to that hot fiery place, on the other side of eternity, sooner than later.

And not too long ago the president who claimed to have a “genius IQ” boasted that his “favorite” daughter is very good at numbers, which indirectly implies that she must have inherited his (or his first wife’s) “mathematical gene.”

An e-card promoting the disruptive title, “If Trump Were Your Math Teacher” (2020).

A phrase that had made its way into Urban Dictionary, but had since mysteriously disappeared from cyberspace.

Trump’s Calculus

Based on the defined meanings of f(x), what could f′′′(x) represent?

The distance between two peeing men is inversely proportional to the degree of friendship between them. (Photo © Anonymous)

or

If F′(x) = f(x), then F(x) might depict the dear speciality coffee beans eaten and excreted by civets.

The sought-after civet cat poo that meets the wants of filthy-rich coffee drinkers.

And what if G′′(x) = f(x)? Would G(x) represent the following picture?

Not all coffee beans are created equal.

Calculus for Civet Cats (and Their Humans)

Can we expect “Calculus for Civet Cats” in a-not-too-distant future?

The Calculus of Donald Trump

Let me end with two “urban calculus definitions” I coined in the aftermath of President Trump’s irrational behaviors.

Did President Trump and gang order this definition to be taken off the Urban Dictionary?

Another approved definition whose days were numbered.

Differentially and integrally yours

© Yan Kow Cheong, September 30, 2019

The Mathematics of Trump and Kim

Even if math educators are politically apathetic or have near-zero interest in world politics, they can’t discount lightly the irrational thoughts, words, and actions of President Trump and Chairman Kim, because the very presence of these two world “leaders” is two too many—the world is far less secure with these two fellows around, especially when at the push of a nuclear button, millions of innocent civilians would be heading to the other side of eternity sooner than later.

Below are two irreverent entries that were approved by the Urban Dictionary editors about Trump and Kim.

Being neither a mathematician nor a politician, I’d be the most unqualified “math educator” to hypothesize how numerate or “logical” or rational these two disruptive politicians are. However, my educational hypothesis about math education in both North Korea and the US is that North Korea Math is probably less inch-deep-mile-wide than US Math.

On January 2, 2013, I tweeted in tongue-in-cheek the following:

If North Korea were to take part in TIMSS, would it be a surprise if its K–12 #math students outperform their counterparts in the US? #TIMSS

If we factor in the educational budget of each participating country in TIMSS and their local teachers’ limited resources, a politically incorrect ranking would probably look as follows:

There are no ranking errors: Singapore isn’t in the top ten (with or without private tuition).

The Rocket Man and the Mentally Deranged US Dotard

Edelman Rodriguez’s “Play Date” @edelstudio (12/6/18)

Which “political unthinking” is more dangerous: “Think like Kim” or “Think like Trump”? Who is a more unpredictable or deadly bully? Is “Fatty Kim the Third“—a derogatory term for the well-fed dictator whose own people are starving in the millions—a mere toothless bully vis-à-vis his American counterpart?

Having zero mercy for your political foes, by torturing them and their family members; and poisoning, hanging, or murdering your siblings and relatives, who you suspect are against you.

Or, tweeting and taunting illegal immigrants, radical Islamists, and the LGBT community, which tends to trigger symptoms of insomnia, irrational fear, anxiety, depression, and trauma—the so-called Trump Stress Disorder (TSD)—which unconfirmed reports suggest that they’re more likely to die sooner of heart attack, or to be victims of racial or ethnic persecution.

Kim’s Digital Murder

Below is a quick-and-dirty e-card I tweeted on August 5, 2018 on dictator-murderer Kim, who had his army of hackers or digital terrorists use Photoshop to “digitally murder” his uncle.

If Kim Jong-Un were a radical Muslim-convert, North Korea could become ISIS’s new HQ! #politics #war some.ly/dCh7Y7b

Mathematical Intercourse between Trump and Kim

Another half-baked mathematical e-card I made and tweeted during the Trump-Kim tête-à-tête in Singapore is the following:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On a nonmathematical note,

and the question is: What do you get if you cross a Trump with a Kim?

and the answer is: Nothing. You can't cross a dictator with a murderer.

Or, on a mathematical note,

and the question is: What do you get if you cross a mosquito Kim with an overweight Trump?

and the answer is: Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scalar.
Bromance of Two Dictators

Singapore as the political matchmaker.

Trump claimed that he and Kim “fell in love” after exchanging letters—it sounds like two egomaniacs trying to outwit each other with their insincere sweet words, by stroking each other’s fragile ego.

Trump-Putin, Trump-Xi, Trump-Sisi, Trump-Erdogan, and now Trump-Kim. It appears that dictators do attract each other! A political hypothesis math educators pursuing a PhD in math education might wish to test is: Dictatorship is quadratic!

From Dictator Putin to Emperor Xi to soon-to-be Pharaoh Sisi, Tweeter-in-Chief or Pinocchio-in-Chief Trump, all these power-hungry men have no limits to controlling more yes-men and yes-women, while expecting blind obedience—those who don’t toe the line are likely to be fired prematurely.

In Trump & Kim We Trust

The Symbolic Trump-Kim Meeting in Singapore

Last June, the Singapore government forked out a wallet-unfriendly $20 million to hold the symbolic meeting between President Trump and Chairman Kim.

A Political Math exercise I tweeted then was: Guesstimate how much on average each taxpayer in Singapore “contributed” to footing the $20 million bill for the Trump-Kim meeting. bit.ly/2sVT6jG

Fire and Fury on Kim and His Gang of Killers

@juche_school1

Unlike his dictatorial and murderous grandfather and father who had longed to meeting a US President while they’re still alive, Kim Jong-un is the luckiest of the unholy trinity in finding a “good friend” in Donald Trump.

Political pundits think that North Korea needs more than trade sanctions for its nuclear and missile programs and the threat they pose to the world. A regime change to deliver North Koreans from the tyranny of the Kim dynasty ought to be in the political pipeline.

Thou Shalt Not Impersonate Thy Leader

Two dictators who dream of the Nobel Peace Prize.
  Photo ©BBC & Ed Jones/Getty

Unlike Vietnam which tries to threaten Trump and Kim impersonators to stop their “mocking acts,” it’s rather surprising that Singapore didn’t ban these pseudo-tyrants from walking around in town to have some political fun with both locals and tourists.

 

Abel & Cain 4.0

Thou shalt not kill thy brother.

On the right is an e-card I wrote and tweeted around the time when Kim Jong Un wanted so badly to exterminate his half-brother, Kim Jong Nam.

And below is an approved entry I contributed on “Kim Jong-un and Kim Jong-nam,” which could no longer be publicly accessed online:

Kim Jong-un and Kim Jong-nam

The modern-day version of the biblical Abel and Cain, with the chances of the two Kims not meeting their late father and grandfather in hell near to zero.

Brothers-rivals Kim Jong-un and Kim Jong-nam serve as ideal plot characters for a Korean spy movie.

Maybe Kim’s hackers felt that the days of its publication should be numbered.

Obama vs. Kim

Unlike a dozen-odd mean tweets on Trump and Kim, any entries on Obama and Kim were in short supply. One I tweeted about them in 2014 in the aftermath of a racist comment on President Obama is the following:

An Unrighteous Deed, Indeed

If Obama is like a "monkey in a tropical forest," then Kim Jong-un must be a "fat pig in Siberia." #North-Korea (@MathPlus on 27/12/14)
Politico-Mathematica à la Singapour

Below are some politically incorrect “political math” questions that teachers could creatively tweak to pitch to their oft-politically challenged students, by conveying the message that math and politics do mix.

1. Parallelism between Two Irrational Personalities

List a dozen parallels between President Trump and Chairman Kim.

For example, Trump and Kim each have been conferred with high-sounding titles for their “contributions” to mankind.

Please call me “Dr. President Trump.”

2. Modeling with Trump and Kim

(a) Trump’s Tweets—Firing by Twitter

Model President Trump’s tweets, which provide a rich source of comedy, into a little juicy formula, which would predict his tweet-before-you-think posts in coming years (assuming that he would still be allowed to tweet behind bars should he be convicted for some political or business collusion with foreign powers).

(b) Kim’s Murders—Murder by Numbers

Formulate a “wicked algorithm” that would guesstimate the number of political critics or foes the Kim dynasty had ordered to be imprisoned, tortured, or killed every year since the Korean War.

3. [Fake] Nobel Prize Winners

What are the odds that the Tweeter-in-Chief and the Murderer-in-Chief might share the coveted the Nobel Peace Prize, if their peaceful actions are perceived to help avert World War III, which could irrationally or maniacally be triggered by pressing their nuclear button?

If someone like Yassir Arafat, who supported terrorism against Israel, could win a Nobel Prize, it’s not far-fetched that both Trump and Kim might be “honored” for fakely bringing world peace to an already-violent world, made insecure by radical Islamists.

4. Political Math

Below are some politico-mathematica questions I posted in recent months.

(a) Political Math: Guesstimate how many false or misleading claims Donald Trump will make by the time he leaves the White House in 2020 (or earlier if he is impeached and imprisoned)—7546 white lies in 700 days. #Singapore #math #politics #estimation #humor (@MathPlus on 30/12/18)
(b) Political Math: Which event has the higher odds of ever happening: Donald Trump winning the Nobel Peace Prize or being canonized as “Saint Trump”? If Arafat can win it, so can Trump! bit.ly/2IwDuP1 #Vatican #peace #sainthood #North-Korea #Singapore #math #miracle #humor (@MathPlus on 18/2/19)
(c) Political Math: What are the odds that if we had had President Hillary Clinton instead of President Donald Trump, she too would have fired the ex-FBI director James Comey, and that her opponents would now be calling for her impeachment and prosecution? #politics #math #hypocrisy (@MathPlus on 3/1/19)

How Trump Does Calculus

(d) Political Math: What are the odds that President Trump would not seek re-election in November 2020 in the aftermath of his impeachment by the House for colluding with Putin and gang? #statistics #SingaporeMath #math #odds #collusion #election #politics #Trump #Putin #humor (@MathPlus on 30/11/18)

5. Murderous Math

Here are some deadly math toughies that may not be apt for politically or religiously immature souls. Caution: Arm yourself, if need be, if you feel that you may be a victim of some form of “mathematical rebellion” from your hostile audience, who may be on a different political or spiritual wavelength as you.

(a) Murderous Singapore Math: What are the odds that there would be a coup in North Korea when Dictator Kim traveled to Hanoi for another symbolic meeting with President Trump? Is China, Iran, Syria, Russia, or Venezuela keen to take him?
Murderous Zeros: If filthy rich Saudis can buy a morally bankrupt fellow like Donald Trump to keep his silence, guesstimate how many “loyal zeros” he is worth to his murderers. #Khashoggi #MBS #murder #guesstimation #math (@Zero_Math on 21/11/18)
Murderous Math: A World Without North Korea—What are the chances that in the aftermath of a North Korean nuclear attack on the US, the Kim dynasty would cease to exist (as the US and allies retaliate to wipe out North Korea from the map)? #war #North-Korea #apocalypse #math (@Zero_Math on 6/12/18)

6. Food & Dog Diplomacy

(a) Singapore Math: What are the chances that North Korea might have a McDonald franchise before having a US embassy? #McKim #humor (@MathPlus on 15/8/17)

McKim was approved on July 13, 2017, and had since been probably “hijacked” by the hackers of the guardian deity of planet Earth.

McKim

The local burger McDonald plans to offer to middle-class North Koreans once Dictator Kim Jong Un and gang give them the green light to operate their first outlet in Pyongyang.

The Trump camp thinks that food diplomacy may be a first step to getting the Kim dictatorship to give up its nuclearization program—they've secretly approached McDonald to come up with a North Korean recipe for McKim.

(b) Dog Diplomacy: Chinese Communists give pandas; North Korean Communists give dogs. bbc.co.uk/news/world-asi… #politics #North-Korea #Communism (@MathPlus on 26/11/18)

(c) Faith in god Kim

Kim’s likely promise to Trump: “I want to denuclearize”—as the sanctions hurt and my dynasty must prevail. But like China, Iran, and Russia, where lying and cheating are in their DNA, can the world trust North Korea & the Kim dynasty? #Singapore #politics (@Zero_Math on 10/6/18)

God Has the Final Say in Trump’s Destiny—Not Men or CNN

Let me end on a positive note on how I re-christened or re-defined “President Trump” on 9/11, the date when he’s miraculously elected in 2016.

How God used an ungodly man to effect political change.

Bibliography & References

Monti, R. A. (2018). Donald Trump in 100 facts. UK: Amberley Publishing.

Pater, R. (2016). The politics of design. Amsterdam: BIS Publishers.

Defector: Kim Jong Un ordered execution by flamethrower https://www.cnn.com/videos/world/2019/02/22/north-korea-defectors-todd-pkg-tsr-vpx.cnn

Vietnam deports Kim Jong-un impersonator ahead of summit http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-47354761

Vietnam detains impersonators of Kim Jong Un and Trump http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-47337945

Vietnamese barber marks summit with free Trump-Kim haircuts http://bit.ly/2tu4Rij

Trump-Kim T-shirts hottest item ahead of Hanoi summit as shops cash in http://bit.ly/2EveqDV

Jim Carrey targets Trump with blunt political cartoons https://www.cnn.com/style/article/jim-carrey-trump-political-cartoons/index.html

© Yan Kow Cheong, February 27, 2019.

A Creative & Disruptive Math Title Coming Your Way*

*Agents keen to represent publishers confident enough to sell an obscene number of If Trump Were Your Math Teacher could contact K C Yan at his e-mail coordinates. A trumpillion thanks!

Pi Day in Singapore

Thousands of students around the world celebrate Pi Day today, but local math students in Singapore can only dream of being part of this annual mathematical event. Singapore math students, teachers, and parents don’t (and can’t) celebrate Pi Day, as long as they officially follow the British style of writing their dates (DD/MM/YY).

What makes matters worse is that this year, Pi Day falls on the first day of the one-week school break, which makes it almost impossible for hardcore math teachers, who want to buck the calendrical trend, to get their students excited about the properties and beauties of the number Pi.

Until Singapore switches to the American style of writing dates (MM/DD/YY), which may not happen, at least during my lifetime, however, this shouldn’t prevent us from evangelizing the gospel of Pi among the local student population.

Here are seven e-gifts of the holy Pi, which I started musing about 314 minutes ago on this Pi Day.

Pi Day vs. Abacus Day

  

A 14-Month Year for Singapore ONLY!

  

Where Are You in Pi?

  

Heavenly Pi

  

The Numerology (or Pseudoscience) of Pi

  

In Remembrace of the Late Singapore PM 

  

Biblical Pi vs. Mathematical Pi

   

Happy Pi Day!

© Yan Kow Cheong, March 14, 2016.