Monthly Archives: December 2023

Mathematical BS

A math definition that has miraculously survived the attack of digital green terrorists.

Are you guilty of speaking (even mild) mathematical bullshit with your fellow math educators? How often do you use these BS phrases consciously or unconsciously to sound more educated or “mathematically civilized”?

If your math HOD talks about squaring the circle, thinking outside (or inside) the box (or cube), or going the extra (second) mile, do you really understand what the heck they’re talking about? Or are they just trying to impress or persuade their teachers to “walk their talk” (yes, another BS term); or worse, to cover up their shortcomings or confuse the new novice teachers?

What are the chances that they may to some degree be farting around some annoying and tiresome jargon to sound like a mathematical bore?

Of course, mathematical BS goes beyond language. Think of those sadistic statistics, data graphics, or infographics, which are often intended to mislead or confuse the audience. Misinformation, disinformation, and the Trump lies—you’re lured by them, because most are often music to the ear, especially if you love indulging in conspiracies, hoaxes, and white supremacist talks.

Context Matters

If a math teacher or educator talks about pushing the envelope, the chances that they may be legitimate are pretty high. If Pinocchios like Donald J. Trump, Boris Johnson, Vladimir V. Putin, and Kim Jong-un do, then it’s probably not—the odds are quasi-zero.

How to Be a Mathematical Bullshitter

How many of these phrases mostly convey empty words trying to sound smart?

always in beta
think outside the box
zero sum game
square the circle
make a 180° turn
the common denominator
360° appraisal
walk the talk
walk the walk
big picture
big ideas
blue sky thinking
pie in the sky
go the extra (second) mile
24/7 or 24/7/365
9 out of 10 agree
journal writing
push the envelope
back to square one
learning experiences
growth mindset
problem-based learning (PBL)
the new (new) normal
miss the forest for the trees
moral calculus

To Bull or Not to Bull?

Is spewing out mathematical BS a form of ineffective communication? A linguistic malpractice you’d try avoiding to reduce any chances of being misinterpreted?

Or do you like them because they make the speaker sound intelligent or educated, albeit their meanings or interpretations are often vague or even dangerous in some extreme cases or contexts?

In most cases, they arguably add spice to the conversation or impress the listeners, because most people who use them aren’t necessarily dishonest or evil-minded, unlike Trump and his gang of morally corrupt advisers and lawyers.

If BS can get Mr. Pinocchio into the White House or remove a country from the WHO, why not you? Your politicians, bosses, and pastors do it all the time (and probably you too), whether you want to admit it or not, so shouldn’t you do it as well since everyone else is guilty of it?

Until we meet again, know that my job isn’t to cure you from any honest or dishonest mathspeak. Why?* You can’t count on me to free you from a life of mathematical BS.

BS-freely yours

© Yan Kow Cheong, December 31, 2023

* The writer is currently undergoing weekly counselling sessions for excessively using BS or PC words in his formal and informal writing; he hopes (and also prays) that he’d find freedom from linguistic obfuscation in using only simple language that even his pets at home could understand him.