Indeed, it hurts if you’re dubbed one! There is no shortage of negative or unflattering labels to describe those who’re apparently born or blessed with the “math gene.”
Fortunately, these days, with so many math geeks using their talent or gifting to help produce all kinds of technological marvels, or helping the world solve a number of wicked problems, respect or awe for the socially awkward or romantically inept seems to be at an all-time high.
Getting Rich from Math
Think of those tens of thousands of millionaires and billionaires worldwide, who’ve made their fortune thanks to the oft-invisible power or applications of math and science.
Their “square” looks or dating habits might make you avoid them like the plague, but you can be sure that a good percentage of these “bores” or “non-blockheads” are laughing all the way to the bank.
Many of those “squares” or “blocks” are being paid handsomely because of their sought-after mathematical or coding skills.
And many of these (oft-foreign-born) guys Trump & gang think they can do without them because they’re “stealing” white-collar jobs or “spying” on Americans—the MAGA cult want to deport (or even demonize) them to protect local high-tech jobsfrom skilled aliens.
Yes, some of these geeky guys and gals are arguably unhandsome or plain-looking. Who cares when math is their god, which has allowed them to retire prematurely or to attain financial independence, when their non-STEM peers are struggling to pay the bill?
Love + Math = Success
And if you’re a hundredaire or thousandaire, it’s not too late to befriend or even date some of them. There is exponential power or benefit when love meets math. When you discover in no time that the square-looking geek is often an (imperfect) circle inside.
Last July, millions across Asia competed for just 300,000 tickets to see Taylor Swift in the “fine” city of Singapore, which will host the only stop in Southeast Asia for the singer’s Eras Tour. Organizers said 22-plus million people registered for pre-sale tickets while online registrations passed the one million mark.
And last night, even pop singer Swift, who kicked off her six sold-out shows at the 55,000-seat National Stadium, couldn’t avoid creating some light-hearted political rift or jealousy among some ASEAN members.
Time magazine’s Person of the Year in 2023
Last month, after Thai Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin “complained” that Singapore had brokered a deal to “pay the pop star up to US$3 million for each of her six concerts—in exchange for keeping the shows exclusive to Singapore in Southeast Asia,” the Singapore Tourism Board admitted it “supported the event through a grant,” sans revealing its size or any conditions attached to it. Guesstimate the amount of grant that was given to stage these coveted events.
Even one unhappy politician from the Philippines said “this isn’t what good neighbors do” and called for his country to register its opposition with Singapore’s embassy. Go ahead, Mr. Joey Salceda.
Cartoon by Shannon Wheeler. #NewYorkerCartoons
Political instability, radical ideology that threatens violence to Western values, and poor infrastructure are oft-unspoken key factors for concert promoters to convince the pop superstar to give regional hubs like Bangkok, Manila, Kuala Lumpur, and Jakarta a miss as part of her “Eras Tour.”
Mathin Pop Culture
With so much excitement (and concern from conservative or puritan parents) about Swift’s six-show tour in Singapore, how could math educators seize the opportunity to excite otherwise mathematically indifferent or apathetic students with some Swift-related math questions or activities?
For instance, what about coining some math or dismal science terms like Swiftematics and Swiftonomics to promote some creative problem posing?
Posing real-life Swift-related math questions is only limited by our imagination. Below is a nontrivial question that was posted on Facebook, whose solution is anything but straightforward.
Posted by Judy Smith Hallett on “Maths Jokes Daily”
Swift’s Carbon Footprint
In 2022, Swift topped the list of celebrities with the highest private jet CO₂ emissions. If her jet pollution were about x times more than the average person’s total annual emissions, estimate x.
The next item is a Swift- or math-friendly question posted by news anchor Peter Busch.
A Math-Friendly Question for Swifties
The Numerology of Taylor Swift
Last month, after reading about Swift’s serial infatuation with her “lucky” number 13, I made an attempt to define Swiftie Math, which is based on the numerology (or pseudoscience) of Taylor Swift.
Since I’ve yet to receive any approval or rejection of the term—whether the editors see it fit for publication—I’d skip posting it online for now.
The Swift-Biden Conspiracy
Theomatically, MAGA evangelicals (or MAGA Xtians, where X ≠ Christ)—a subset of Christian nationalists—in red-pilled states haven’t failed to warn netizens about the “satanic” influences of Taylor Swift’s songs, but have hypocritically or selectively remained silent about the fraudulent, criminal, and sexual activities of their “political savior.”
Does Taylor Swift CAST SPELLS On Her Listeners?!
Conspiracies about the singer’s alleged support for President Biden have been rife in political and religious circles to paint Ms. Swift as an “ambassador of Satan,” who’s shown zero sign in supporting Trump and his cult.
Puritan Trumpublicans are hell-bent to warn millions of Swifties from unknowingly becoming witches lest they and their idol lose their souls, but, interestingly, hardly anything from these patriots calling for a nationwide corporate prayer for the soul of their beloved un-Christian ex-president.
A math definition that has miraculously survived the attack of digital green terrorists.
Are you guilty of speaking (even mild) mathematical bullshit with your fellow math educators? How often do you use these BS phrases consciously or unconsciously to sound more educated or “mathematically civilized”?
If your math HOD talks about squaring the circle, thinking outside (or inside) the box (or cube), or going the extra (second) mile, do you really understand what the heck they’re talking about? Or are they just trying to impress or persuade their teachers to “walk their talk” (yes, another BS term); or worse, to cover up their shortcomings or confuse the new novice teachers?
What are the chances that they may to some degree be farting around some annoying and tiresome jargon to sound like a mathematical bore?
Of course, mathematical BS goes beyond language. Think of those sadistic statistics, data graphics, or infographics, which are often intended to mislead or confuse the audience. Misinformation, disinformation, and the Trump lies—you’re lured by them, because most are often music to the ear, especially if you love indulging in conspiracies, hoaxes, and white supremacist talks.
Context Matters
If a math teacher or educator talks about pushing the envelope, the chances that they may be legitimate are pretty high. If Pinocchios like Donald J. Trump, Boris Johnson, Vladimir V. Putin, and Kim Jong-un do, then it’s probably not—the odds are quasi-zero.
How to Be a Mathematical Bullshitter
How many of these phrases mostly convey empty words trying to sound smart?
always in beta think outside the box zero sum game square the circle make a 180° turn the common denominator 360° appraisal walk the talk walk the walk big picture big ideas blue sky thinking pie in the sky go the extra (second) mile 24/7 or 24/7/365 9 out of 10 agree journal writing push the envelope back to square one learning experiences growth mindset problem-based learning (PBL) the new (new) normal miss the forest for the trees moral calculus
To Bull or Not to Bull?
Is spewing out mathematical BS a form of ineffective communication? A linguistic malpractice you’d try avoiding to reduce any chances of being misinterpreted?
Or do you like them because they make the speaker sound intelligent or educated, albeit their meanings or interpretations are often vague or even dangerous in some extreme cases or contexts?
In most cases, they arguably add spice to the conversation or impress the listeners, because most people who use them aren’t necessarily dishonest or evil-minded, unlike Trump and his gang of morally corrupt advisers and lawyers.
If BS can get Mr. Pinocchio into the White House or remove a country from the WHO, why not you? Your politicians, bosses, and pastors do it all the time (and probably you too), whether you want to admit it or not, so shouldn’t you do it as well since everyone else is guilty of it?
Until we meet again, know that my job isn’t to cure you from any honest or dishonest mathspeak. Why?* You can’t count on me to free you from a life of mathematical BS.
* The writer is currently undergoing weekly counselling sessions for excessively using BS or PC words in his formal and informal writing; he hopes (and also prays) that he’d find freedom from linguistic obfuscation in using only simple language that even his pets at home could understand him.
